There was a rare moment of optimism for the motor trade this week with news that bragging about what a bargain you got when buying a car has reached its highest level since records began.
‘This is certainly something to be celebrated,’ said Peter-Peter Spoom of dealer body the Council Of National Traders & Salesmen. ‘Whilst many people aren’t buying a car at the moment, it’s heartening to discover that those that do are so pleased with the deals they are getting they won’t fucking shut up about them’.
The record levels of boasting and smugness are said to have been particularly good news for those seeking an ageing luxury car. ‘Well specced big cars have really benefited,’ notes Spoom. ‘Recently I heard of a 2005 BMW 7-series being sold for £37, and that included a free holiday in Bermuda. I’m also aware of one buyer who managed to secure a well cared-for Lexus LS430 that the seller actually paid him 12 grand to take away’.
However, Spoom warns that a prolonged period of bragging about bargains could actually have the reverse effect. ‘Already we have seen that the perhaps mistaken notion that cars are literally being given away is starting to drive prices upwards at an unprecedented rate,’ he warned. ‘Last week, for example, I heard of someone paying £47 million pounds for a four year old Jaguar X-type with one wheel missing and what appeared to be a blob of turd on the passenger seat’.
Spoom later admitted that he was making it up as he went along, just like everyone else who talks about used car prices at the moment.
