‘Allo ‘allo ‘allo. D.I. Blundell done be reporting. On Friday 29 July I was proceeding in a Westerly direction towards my August holiday, what done be in August, when I done receive a radio message alerting me to an incident what done just taken place. A large broadcasting organisation, what done later be identified as one Sky Television of Middlesex, done approach another large broadcasting organisation, what done be one BBC of White City, and done take from it an item of substantial value.
It done be wise in such a situation to done offer an assailant no resistance and it done appear that the BBC done follow this course of action. However, they done then receive assistance from an IC1 male, later identified as one Bernard Ecclestone of Kensington, who done help them to cling on to some of the item, though these done be, in fairness, only scraps.
The BBC done indicated no desire to done press charges against the assailant or attempt to reclaim the property what done been taken. However, we done subsequently receive several million complaints from F1 fans who done, to be honest, been robbed. Over and out.