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Briatore rules out F1 return

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Flavio Briatore, yesterday

Flavio Briatore has ruled out a return to F1, stating emphatically that ‘Formula 1 is like wine, is women, is all things, maybe looking is nice but super sexy time.’

In an interview with Every Other Sunday magazine, the former Renault team principal firmly expressed his ambivalence about future involvement in the sport; ‘Is no time for me to make is happy accident for believe is to make the special,’ the amply gutted swordsman insisted. ‘You know, is me the person, is also the blah blah blah, you know? And that is make what is always forwards and is not always with true but also the heart, because this is the thing, is moment of what happened but that is future also, yes?’

Asked if he missed Formula 1, the sex pesty looking billionaire was equally categorical; ‘Why is make imagination for think, and always think, and be make like believe of the special is okay. You know, all times all be helicopter or is speedboat and is be reason but I say, hey, you know, what is for being crazy time? Is, you know, all of this that make super model or super car or what, you know, is all making consistency magic tasty wibble wobble bibble boddle boom boom boom let me hear you say way-o.’

Flavio Briatore is expected to announce his return to Formula 1 next week.