Crazy Dave

Crazy D reports from Monaco 2014

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CrazyDave2014Och aye tha noo muthafukas! Crazy Dave comin’ in yo face on the Double Bizzle Cizzle wit’ a well cut package. Of highlights. So las’ weekend we drop down MC-side fo’ tha Monaco G-diddy-Pizzle an’ all tha cats, they be chattin’ ‘bout what be goin’ down between ma homies at tha MC Edes, Da Ham and NiRo. They be sayin’ dis be tha biggest teamhomie smackdown since Biggie Prost and Tupac Sennur (RIP).

Come tha Sat’day shootout, dems be tha muddyfunsters at tha good end cuz ain’t no brother gonna touch ‘em. Jus’ a question of who gets it on tha one slot. When tha tablecloth be out, NiRo be tha one wit’ the small time and he be on a hot one, but then what this shit be goin’ down? That homie looses it like house keys in tha Mirizzlebeauizzle and parks it on tha loser chute. Them mellow yellows be wavin’ and Da Ham, he ain’t got no way to escape tha twos. It all be seemin’ a little suspizzle but tha stews, lead by ma old time homie Dizzle Warwizzle, they say tings be cool. Full accessizzle to tha datizzle.

Come tha five an’ out, NiRo be holding tha ones and Da Ham be on tha chase and nuff respec’ to ma mumbly brother K Raikk cuz that cat be makin’ up places, sweet like chocolate vodka. Dat shit stick though cuz when ma don’t-give-him-a-glass homie A Sut be shakin’ hands with Mr Barrier, the safety car come out to play an’ the Raikkmeister be getting’ in a tyre poppin’ smackdown wit’ ma to finish last, last you gotta finish brother Maxi Chill. Avoidabizzle collisizzle with a backmarkizzle.

Up tha business end, Da Ham still ain’t stickin’ it to NiRo and that Pussycat chasin’ homie be droppin’ back. Next ting, he be lookin’ under threat from ma perma smilin’ down under brother D Riccy. Da Ham’s weekend goin’ bad, and Crazy D don’ mean good. That cat gonna need a excuse worthy of Nigizzle Mansizzle heself, and fortunately he got it. Inexplicabizzle piece of dizzle in he eyizzle.

Come tha wavy black an’ white, it be NiRo on the ones, Da Ham on two and D Riccy on tha three slot. But mad props to make Yorkshire homies Marussia who be scorin’ they first ever points in, like, ever. Reetizzle grandizzle.

And don’t forget, in less than three weeks’ time we’ll have full and complete live coverage of the Canadian Grand Prix on BBC One, BBC Five Live and on the red button.