Local Corrado ‘hasn’t moved in ages’

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The Corrado, yesterday
The Corrado, yesterday

The Volkswagen Corrado on the corner of Gresty Street hasn’t moved ‘in ages’ according to shock reports coming out of Frigginham today.

‘It’s been there for, like, at least six months now and I don’t think I’ve seen it move once,’ reported local resident Wendle Snud. ‘But it is still taxed,’ he added, suspiciously.

Mr Snud confirmed that the Corrado’s roof is ‘quite mossy’, that its tyres are ‘pretty soft’ and that it has had a flyer for a local gym tucked under the passenger side windscreen wiper ‘for at least a month’.

‘The bodywork is pretty faded and there are a few scuffs on it,’ Mr Snud explained. ‘Also, the radio is missing but I don’t think it’s been broken into. I told my friend Phil I thought the owner had died but he said that was silly.’

As a self-confessed ‘Corrado fan’, Mr Snud admitted he was concerned about how long the Volkswagen had remained in the same spot; ‘It breaks my heart to see a modern classic just neglected like that and someone should step in and rescue it,’ he said. ‘I would happily do it myself if I needed an old, early, eight valve Corrado with red paint that’s gone a bit pink. Which of course I don’t.’