New anniversary edition Mini

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An Mini, yesterday
An Mini, yesterday

Mini has announced a new special edition created to mark 10 years of people moaning about the Mini on the internet.

Called the Oh God, Not This Shit Again Edition, the new car commemorates a whole decade of awful bores droning on about how the new Mini ‘misses the point’ even though they seem to have long forgotten the point themselves.

The Oh God, Not This Shit Again Edition boasts several unique features including a sanctimonious exhaust note, repetitive sat-nav and upholstery that depicts Sir Alec Issigonis ‘turning in his grave’.

The car will come with a specially created commemorative booklet which attempts to outline a brief history of the Mini but soon veers inexorably into a dull and ill-informed rant about how BMW ‘stole’ the name from Rover.

As a finishing flourish, the bootlid badge has been modified to read, ‘Mini? Maxi more like’ in an annoying way.

The Mini Oh God, Not This Shit Again Edition will be too expensive and too big and you wouldn’t catch me driving one of those, not in a month of Sundays and why have cars got so big anyway it’s because of all those airbags which are completely pointless unless you’re a meddling EU bureaucrat and don’t get me started on etc etc etc