Later this year Mazda will reveal a brand new MX5. At the moment little is known about this vital new model but here are a few things Sniff Petrol would like to see, and NOT like to see, in the Japanese company’s fourth generation roadster.
YES! Keep the name as ‘MX5’ or ‘Miata’ depending on market.
NO! Change the name in all markets to ‘the Mazda Twatstain’.
YES! Make the body even lighter for lively performance and agile handling.
NO! Accidentally fill the passenger compartment and boot with a simply enormous number of bowling balls.
YES! Offer a simple range of light, revvy four cylinder engines.
NO! Inexplicably fit a badly maintained, foul smelling and leaky single-cylinder diesel engine from a dumper truck.
YES! Retain a short, precise, mechanical gear shift action.
NO! Inadvertently wire the gear lever to an insanely high voltage electrical supply that actually gets even stronger as revs rise.
YES! Use clear, simple analogue instruments.
NO! Install a ventilation system that constantly tries to fire wasps at your face and body.
YES! Fit simple, comfortable sports seats.
NO! Needlessly cover all available interior surfaces with rotating knives and sticky things.
YES! Give the interior plenty of useful cubby spaces for phones, wallets etc.
NO! Fit a gun inside the glovebox that goes off every time the car hits a bump.
YES! Keep the starting price relatively affordable.
NO! Introduce a scheme in which signing dealer paperwork leads to six years of constant extortion from an endless stream of masked men visiting your house in the middle of the night.
YES! Offer bright, vivid paint options.
NO! Write the word PAEDOCAR down the sides in illuminated letters.
