Honda reveals new concept

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The new concept, yesterday
The new concept, yesterday

Honda will use this week’s Paris motor show to reveal an exciting new car aimed precisely at their target market, called the Jazz Type R-thritis.

Although billed as a concept, the Jazz Rthritis is a fully working prototype and has been tested extensively on the legendary Nurburgingroad. As a result, the chassis is said to be ‘at the extremes of comfortableness’ and, although Honda won’t confirm details, the car is reputed to crack the magic 8 minute mark for getting into a parking space outside the Post Office.

Under the bonnet, Honda’s detuning experts have worked their magic on the standard 1.3-litre engine and promise an unprecedented lack of power, allowing speeds of up to 46mph which can be maintained even through a 30 zone.

Inside, the Type R-thritis boasts a pair of moisture resistant armchairs and an advanced voice recognition system that can respond to a variety of inputs including, ‘Oooh, hasn’t it gone cold all of a sudden’, ‘How’s your Brian?’ and ‘Who are you? Are you Carol’s daughter? The one with the biscuits?’

Honda has given no indication of when or if the Jazz Type R-thritis might enter production but visitors to the Paris show will be invited to enter an interactive booth and vote on their reaction to the car by pressing one of two buttons, labeled ‘Ooooh, that’s right nice’ and ‘Oh dear no, it looks a bit spicy. Are you Derek’s son?’