Chevrolet has confirmed that the new Camaro will be America’s first car to be made available with extra cheese.
‘When our customers told us what they wanted, we listened hard over the sound of all the gunfire and incest,’ said GM spokesman, Guyeme Spoeksmann. ‘That’s why the 2016 Camaro has the option of an extra thick layer of delicious American cheese on all variants.’
The new Camaro will be offered in four, six or eight cylinder versions, all of which can be slathered in over 200 pounds of bright orange, highly processed, low quality cheese.
‘Chevy has raised the game here,’ said car writer Carl Righter. ‘Sure, the 2016 Mustang will have available ranch sauce on V8 variants, but only the Camaro will offer a fuck ton of cheese across all trim packages.’
‘Extra cheese? Hell yeah,’ shouted a Camaro customer yesterday. ‘This car is so Goddam American sometimes it makes my butt hurt.’