11 signs your car needs a service

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Does your car need a service? Thanks to Sniff Petrol’s internet-filling drivel correspondent BUZZFACT CLICKBAYTE, here are 11 signs that it could need a trip to the garage


1. Garage rings and says, ‘Hello, our records show that your car needs a service’.

2. Grinding noise turns out not to be elderly gentleman with walking frame jammed underneath car this time.

3. Following items illuminated on dashboard; a) Check engine light. b) No, really, check engine light. c) Jesus Christ, can’t you see all that steam and brown stuff coming out of me light.

4. Garage rings and says, ‘Hi, just following up on our call last week about your car needing a service’.

5. Seeing Ross Kemp on Thursday for annual Cluedo evening and remember that last year it was on the same day you got your car serviced.

6. Last of the air has now left the tyres.

7. Garage rings and says, ‘Just to say we do have servicing appointments available all week if you’re interested in giving your car the yearly service that it requires’.

8. Visited by the ghost of previous, broken engine.

9. Definitely more noises than usual.

10. Villagers report seeing a mighty falcon in the valley.

11. Garage rings, apologises for hassling you about whole service thing.