The Tokyo Motor Show is a motor show which takes place in Tokyo. Here is a report from it and there and it.
Big news at Nissan was the R-PATZ concept which features weirdly intense headlights and a massive amount of terrible fan fiction in the boot.
Over at Toyota, all eyes were on a new concept made entirely of thoughts and which runs purely on the power of humming. The extraordinary new car is called Hikai, which is a traditional Japanese word meaning ‘eye infection’.
Back on the Nissan stand, there was much interest in the N-DUBZ concept which features a ridiculously tall roof and an engine that boasts about how many drugs it runs on. A company spokesman promises that, with any luck, the concept should go away in a couple of years.
Honda were debuting a new alternative fuel concept called the FHX Pasquale which runs on helium. Engineers acknowledge that the engine note is quite high.
Returning to Nissan, company bosses took the covers off the distinctive J-LO concept which is wider at the back than the front and must be kept in a garage full of candles and white linen.
Suzuki used Tokyo to announce a new concept called the Fancy Man Hot Soup Splendide. The radical one-off is made of condiment sachets pocketed from chain restaurants while the engine is fuelled entirely by conversations with your dad about the weather.
Nissan showed off the R-SOUL concept which the company says is designed to be driven by ‘bellends, cockholes and titwipes’. The concept has already attracted a great deal of interest from a London-based estate agency chain.
Daihatsu debuted their new KXX Happy Smile Deluxe Time Hmmm? concept which is described as ‘idiotically small’ with an engine that ‘will not stop asking you about turtles’.
Finally, the show saw the first public display of the Nissan X-WIFE which has got all your stuff and must be given £1200 a month or it’ll throw all your records in a skip.