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Thing no one cares about splits from other thing no one cares about

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A Infiniti, yesterday
A Infiniti, yesterday

Red Bull this week announced the end of its relationship with Infiniti, causing enormous disappointment amongst no one.

‘This is such a shame,’ said industry analyst Ian Dustryan-Allyst. ‘Red Bull has worked so hard to become no one’s favourite Formula 1 team and their status as perhaps one or two people’s third or fourth favourite at best made them a perfect fit for Infiniti who set a new benchmark in the luxury sector, as long as the only parameter you measured was complete disinterest.’

‘Put the two together,’ Dustryan-Allyst continued. ‘And you could see the results were, um… oh look, a pigeon.’

The effect of the split is sure to be have almost no repercussions for Red Bull who will continue in F1 now they’ve stopped mincing about pretending they don’t have an engine. For Infiniti, however, the effect could be more dramatic with some market guides forecasting a European sales drop of 75 percent leading to an estimated 2016 sales total of half a car.