Renault announces app car

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Renault, yesterday
Renault, yesterday

Renault will use next week’s Geneva motoring show to launch a car that is just an app.

‘Instead of going to an old-fashioned showroom to buy this car, you simply download it,’ explained the company’s directeur du technologie, Derek Turdu-Technologie. ‘You get all the very latest high-tech elements modern buyers expect on a car these days such as smart nav and music streaming with none of the old fashioned parts such as bodywork, wheels and an engine.’

‘Naturally, the new car is fully voice controlled,’ M. Turdu-Technologie continued. ‘So, for example, rather than doing something as outdated as touching buttons you simply tell it that you want to go to Bristol. Obviously, it can’t actually take you to Bristol because it’s just an app but that’s okay because our research says millennials don’t want to go to Bristol anyway.’

The new app will be available in a range of trim levels, including a Zigazah special edition which will have different virtual wheeltrims and red virtual seatbelts. Next year there will be a Renaultsport version of the app which will load faster.