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Hamilton arrives in Bahrain wearing a hearing aid

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Lewis Hamilton, yesterday
Lewis Hamilton, yesterday

Lewis Hamilton has followed up on the fake glasses he sported in Australia by arriving in Bahrain wearing a pretend hearing aid.

The reigning world champion said it was ‘part of a look’ he was ‘trying out’ and was later spotted in the paddock asking people to ‘speak up’ before conspicuously fiddling with the ear-mounted device and saying, ‘oooh, I think the batteries have gone’ in a slightly too-loud voice.

Mercedes insiders say if this weekend’s fake hearing aid project is a success, Hamilton has some more fashion-forward ailments in mind, starting with a plan to blunder around the paddock in China shouting, ‘Arrrgh, my insulin!’, working up to May’s Monaco Grand Prix in which he will sport at least one prosthetic limb.

‘This all sounds tremendous,’ said Morrissey, yesterday.