All barns now empty

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An barn, yesterday
An barn, yesterday

There was bad news for classic car fans today as it was announced that all barns are now empty.

‘Unfortunately, we’ve looked into this and it turns out that every single barn in Britain has now been emptied of cars that have been there for years,’ explained car investment expert Karen Vestment-Ecspert. ‘From now on, barns will only contain hay bales and farm equipment and not an extremely dusty Aston Martin that is claimed to need “some recommissioning”.’

Today’s barn news is sure to have a dramatic effect on the number of faded, rotten, mouse-gnawed classic cars appearing at auction and selling for twice the expected value, despite being little more than a seized engine surrounded by straw and rust.

‘This will certainly have an effect on the classics market,’ Vestment-Ecspert concluded. ‘In fact, it could cause the biggest shift since the drought of elderly owners who have had the car since new and the decline in MOT testers who feel the need to comment in a positive way on the condition of the car so that they can later be quoted in an advert.’