Motorsport News

F1 can’t wait to find out how Ecclestone is going to somehow regain control of everything

by
Bernie Ecclestone, yesterday

There was excitement in Formula 1 today as teams and drivers eagerly awaited the way in which Bernie Ecclestone will somehow regain control of the sport.

‘It’s only a matter of time,’ said one paddock insider. ‘And we can’t wait to see what Bernie’s got up his sleeve to re-gain unilateral control of the sport he erroneously believes to be his in perpetuity,’ they added, wordily.

Current theories about the way in which Ecclestone will somehow get control of F1 again just when everyone thought we’d seen the back of him include ‘bloodless coup’, ‘blood-filled coup’ and ‘some kind of moustache trap’.

‘My money is on discovering he’s the main shareholder of Liberty, and that he’s suddenly able to sell the sport back to himself,’ said another anonymous source. ‘However it happens, we can’t wait to see how Bernie inevitably regains control of F1 and then manages to be a massive prick about it.’