Following last weekend’s surprisingly entertaining Chinese Grand Prix, Formula 1’s new bosses have decided to improve the action at all subsequent races by taking control of the weather.
Insiders are convinced the weather played a big part in the success of the Chinese race, leading to memorable moments such as Giovinazzi blowing Sauber’s overdraft and Sergio Perez making one of his occasional withdrawals from the talent bank.
‘We were really impressed with how things panned out in China,’ said an F1 source. ‘So from now on all races will have a dank fog on the Friday that cancels practise and then some pre-race rain on the Sunday.’
Formula 1 management will achieve their new atmospheric moisture-based aim using a special weather controlling machine which they found in Bernie Ecclestone’s lock-up, hidden behind a pile of allegations that it would be inadvisable to repeat.
‘Bernie never deployed the weather machine to make racing better because there was no money in it,’ explained an insider. ‘So he just kept it for his own amusement, by which I mean using it to annoy Jackie Stewart.’