Tesla promises over-the-air update to stop Elon Musk sounding like such a dick

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Tesla has promised an imminent over-the-air update for Elon Musk which will “significantly reduce” the quantity of total horseshit coming out of his face.

“We’re working flat out to get this OTA update released and installed in Elon’s brain,” said a company insider. “Hopefully before he says something else that makes him sound like a petulant dysfunctional dickwad.”

The emergency update has been prompted by “technical issues” with Musk’s brain which have caused what engineers call “an undesirable excess of douchebaggery” in certain circumstances such as being on an earnings call, responding to a safety issue, or waking up in the morning.

How the over-the-air update will work

“We will release this OTA update for Elon just as soon as we’re sure it doesn’t contain any bugs that might, for example, cause him to start selling flamethrowers on Twitter like some kind of moronic incel who’s forgotten to take his Ritalin,” explained one software engineer. “Hopefully we can get it out there before he Tweets some shit like ‘Where we’re going we won’t need brakes!’.”

When work on the latest OTA update for Elon Musk’s insouciant twattishness issue is complete it’s thought Tesla engineers will turn their attention to an update that might restore some of Grimes’s credibility.